Sunday, August 8, 2010

Stream of Consciousness

This is going to be random. I apologize now.

Have you ever noticed how much the small things can impact your life? Nothing huge happened yesterday. Nothing of any consequence. It was just a day. But when I woke up this morning I felt like yesterday was a good day, a big day, a consequential day. I'm not really sure why.

I had coffee with a friend yesterday and walked around Target for two hours. It's something I haven't done with her in literally a couple of years. I always want to go walk around Target (ask Steven), but it's never the same when I don't have one of my girl-friends with me. It was so simple, but such a blessing considering how the past month has been.

The past month. Oy. It's been a month, as of yesterday since we lost Donna. A whole month. That hit me hard yesterday when I was hanging out with my father-in-law and a large envelope arrived from the funeral home in Corpus Christi. We knew what it was before we opened it. We ignored it all afternoon as we ran around and had lunch, but when we got home it was still there, looming and ugly. Opening it and reading it made it real. I still don't want it to be real.

I'm so blessed. After Steven got off work yesterday we went over and hung out with my family. We laughed, we picked on each other, and we got irritated and cranky as we always do. We teased Allison about "Pablo," the boyfriend we made up for her. Steven even crank called her cell phone and left a message from "Pablo" for her to find this morning.

We laughed all the way home.

Yesterday was an incredibly good, sad, happy, crazy day. It's a day I can't label, but it was a day I loved,  tarnished with a moment I hated to remind me how good my life really is. 

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